no tittle.
"That was the thing. You never got used to it, the idea of someone being gone. Just when you think it’s reconciled, accepted - someone points it out to you, and it just hits you all over again, that shocking."
Tepi jalan.
Kecewa memang takkan pernah hilang, kecewa manusia selalu diselangi dengan kenangan. Masa aku tengah lemah dari semangat yang hilang, datang seseorang, dia pesan sambil usap-usap rambut, dengan lembut dia cakap "hidup nie kena ada disiplin, rambut kena jaga, sikat bagi nampak kemas, sikat ada?". Aku jawab takda. Dia bagi sikat dia bagi cekak rambut, dia cakap pakai nanti "jaga elok-elok". Dan dia cakap lagi "jangan tunjuk yang kita lemah, nampak tak terurus, nanti orang tahu kita lemah orang pijak kita. Lemah tue biar dalam rumah, luar kena tunjuk kita kuat". Aku senyum aku angguk, aku tertanya-tanya, "kenapa orang yang baru aku kenal boleh elok-elok tegur aku?"
Another hdkdnidjdbrh
You left me hanging. Twice. And that hurts the most. And now I realized, I'm just a mere backup.
Illusion
Humans always created an illusion made for themselves. For their needs, for their desires, for their happiness, for their satisfaction and most of all, for the sake of throwing away the pain and sorrow they have deep inside.
Owhdhxyjdjehdkoahdd
Received a call from Baba makes me burst into tears. How I miss him. How I miss them. How I miss being surrounded by every each of them whom showing their love in their own ways. How I badly need someone to hug me, right now, in my weakest point. or at least to have somebody sitting here right behind me, just sitting for hours in silence, could be such a relief for me.
Fuckin' extra
Stressed out. Depressed. I need an extra plus plus plus extra shot of coffee. How I wish I didn't made this stupid decision to came to this fucking place. I just wanna go home. Yes fucking home. Where I can hide and lock myself in my own space and hibernate and shut down and cry myself out loud. Where I don't have to fake a fucking smile to every single person. I just wanna out of this hell. This fucking fucking fucking hell !
Eyes, nose, lips.
Don’t be sorry,
that makes me more pitiful.
With your pretty red lips,
please hurry, kill me and go.
I’m all right.
Look at me one last time.
Smile like nothing’s wrong,
so when I miss you I can remember.
So I can draw your face in my mind.
My selfishness that couldn’t let you go turned into an obsession that imprisoned you.
Were you hurt because of me?
You sit silently.
Why am I a fool, why can’t I forget you.
You’re already gone.
Your eyes, nose, lips
Your touch that used to touch me,
to the ends of your fingertips.
I can still feel you.
but like a burnt out flame,
burnt and destroyed all of our love
it hurts so much, but now I’ll call you a memory.
Love you, loved you
I must have not been enough
Maybe I could see you just once by coincidence.
Everyday I grow restless,
Everything about you is becoming faint.
You smile back in our pictures,
unknowing of our approaching farewell.
Your black eyes that only saw me.
Your nose that held the sweetest breath.
Your lips that whispered ‘i love you, i love you’...
Lintasan hati.
Lintasan hati boleh jadi satu doa kan ? Sebab doa tue sendiri adalah harapan. Moga Tuhan perkenankan.
Weak spot.
She's my weak spot. The one thing that will always bring me to my knees, regardless of how strong I think I am.
Glance.
How I wish to be there with you. Seizing the days and laugh upon the stories we're telling each other. Glancing your face and smile upon it. Looking at you for a couple seconds broke me down, torn apart. If only you know how I miss those hands that never fail to shake my world. I miss you Ajaa.
Past.
Can we go back to the time it was me and you? Probably not. But just thought you know... those are one of the things I wished for so badly.
